The Fair

The Berlin Fair went as follows:

Here is the fair in all its Berliny glory, which includes two nu-goth/punk kids. "Hold up!" says PunkBoy to PunkGirl, "I think there's a sale at Hot Topic! Let's go!"

My companions for the day, Brenda and Bob, enjoy the fair cuisine.

And then it was time to see the Adult and Children's craft exhibits. People often enter their collections, under the mistaken assumption that they're impressive. Sorry, nine year-old kid whose parents actually let him enter his collection of "Crab Bodies" (which are, yes, crab body parts he most likely found while walking along Connecticut's polluted coastline), but you're not that cool. And you need a better hobby. Here are two of the more awesome collections:

This was in the "adult" section. Some people won't let the only major professional sports team to bless this state go. Even though it's been gone for like ten years. And I can't believe he won second prize. That's it! Next year I'm entering my collection of grass clippings.

She loves gimp. Hee.

And then it was off to the petting zoo. Last year, there was a small incident when the donkey bit my arm. Hard. So hard that it left a donkey-mouth-shaped bruise on my forearm that didn't go away for a week, and everyone laughed at me. I didn't tell the fair officials, but I guess someone found out, because this year:

Precautionary measures had been taken.

I vent my frustration at the shooting gallery. The carny was suitably impressed at my mad shooting skillz. He said I could have won a prize if I hadn't gotten "carried away" at the end and gone all "G.I. Jane." Whatever; I didn't want a prize. I just wanted the thrill of shooting at stuff.

Brenda and I share a free hot dog, given to us by a "Doggie Shack" worker who's friends with Bob. It's still a thrill to be able to buy beer, after going to the fair for fifteen years and being underage. When Bob saw how this picture came out, he said I looked "mentally retarded." Maybe so, but check out Weird Beard in the back.

By the end of a long day, even the carnies are all tuckered out! Shhh...they're so cute when they're sleeping.

And now I'm off to England. Because England doesn't have the internet, I won't be able to update until I come back next week. If you miss me, you can read my latest recap.