I Am The Rainmaker

In case anyone was wondering why this happened, the answer is I paid for a car wash not an hour before.

Even in the freaking desert, it rains every time I get my car washed.



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They have 100% of my daily allowance of saturated fat, but they're so damn good.



Evil Ex-Roommate and I were driving home from the gym just now when we witnessed a crime!

It all started when we turning left onto Bronson from Sunset. Evil Ex-Roommate was driving and telling me about his latest date, while I sat in the passenger seat and quietly sulked about the fact that he has so many dates and I don't. So I was looking down at my feet when I heard a noise and then Evil Ex-Roommate shouted "oh my god!" I looked up, and saw a car, a guy and his bike lying on the ground next to it, and two other guys shouting. Evil Ex-Roommate said that the guy was waiting for the light to change to cross Sunset. The front of his bike had edged out onto the street. A car turned right from Bronson onto Sunset and drove into the bike, knocking it over along with the guy holding it. The driver stopped the car for a second, but then, to my surprise, drove right off. I was waiting for him to pull over, but he didn't. He just kept going. "Hmm ... I should really get the license plate number of that car!" I thought, and quickly turned to look at it. Finally, my photographic memory would actually be useful.

But it all happened so fast and I didn't get the plate number. I couldn't even give you a good description of the car or the guy in it, except that the car was grey and old and the guy was smiling, which was why I initially didn't think he had hit anyone. I would assume that when you hit someone with your car, you, like, frown or look upset. Then again, I would also assume that you would stay to make sure your victim was okay, so obviously me and that guy have two different opinions on the proper car assault etiquette.

Evil Ex-Roommate and I were left sitting at the red light staring at the kid and his bike and two other guys on the street corner. I told Evil Ex-Roommate to roll the window down so we could ask the guy if he was okay, but Evil Ex-Roommate said the guy seemed fine -- it was his bike that was hit, not him -- and there were two people with him already. Then two more guys came walking up and it looked like they had also seen what happened and hopefully had done a better job than us of getting the license plate number. Evil Ex-Roommate decided that we couldn't be of any help at the scene and also that it was late and he had been up since five in the morning to drive someone to the airport and he wanted to go to bed and not have to spend the next however many hours giving the police his eye-witness report. And neither of us had any information to give anyway. So the light turned green and Evil Ex-Roommate turned left and that was the end of it.

When Evil Ex-Roommate dropped me off at my apartment, I said that we had let down the guy who got hit by that car and the community at large with our crappy witnessing abilities. I hope the next time I witness a crime, I do better.

Dayle Hinman would be so ashamed of me. Speaking of CourtTV, I'd love to watch it right now but Time Warner Cable says they're experiencing disruptions in the video feed due to "solar flares." So I have no TV. I hate the sun.