I didn't write it, but I am featured in it. By "featured" I mean that there's a picture of me that serves to prove two seperate hypotheses: 1. the pizza was very, very big, and 2. I don't photograph well. There are also some quotes from me that are probably considered offensive. I would like to point out, however, that I was misquoted: I said Kurt Loder and Tabitha Soren had informed babies, not deformed babies. I mean, they could be deformed, too, but I said informed because I figured that the children of two sub-par newscasters would know a lot about current events.
Anyway, it's here.